Loser 11th Grader Still Hasn’t Lost Virginity to English Teacher

WACO, Texas—According to multiple sources, Mark Dodson, a junior at David Koresh High School, is the sole boy in his class who has yet to lose his virginity to Sandra Benton, who teaches 11th grade English.

“I feel like such a loser,” Dodson admits, “When I look around and every one of my friends is already having sex with Miss Benton, except for me, it makes me wonder what’s wrong with me.”

High school can be a difficult experience for many kids, especially those who feel they are being left behind in terms of life experiences by their friends.  But, luckily for Dodson, his school has a strong support system already in place for students who feel overwhelmed by the pressure to have sex with Miss Benton.

“Everyone develops at different paces,” explains Ingrid Heffler, the school’s guidance counselor, “My advice to Mark would be to not try to rush things, or let his expectations get too lofty, or sex with Miss Benton will ultimately be a disappointment.”

While Dodson has suffered some teasing by some of the boys who have regular sex with Miss Benton, his friends have been supportive.

“I keep telling him not to worry or try too hard,” said Tom Sanders, Dodson’s best friend since second grade, “Just let it happen naturally.  When he least expects it, he’ll suddenly find himself experiencing the wonder and joys of sex with Miss Benton.”

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